Tuesday, April 7, 2015

bringing up boys

The boys went down to the farm a little early to go fishing with PopPop.  They ended up bulldozing a tree, sliding down rock piles,  riding a 4-wheeler, building a fire and playing around with the bait worms. It was like a dream weekend for my boys…hubs included! 

I am right in the middle of Bringing Up Boys by James Dobson. It has been so insightful for me in this season. If you have any little men in your world, you might find it helpful. I think I'll need to re-read it in another few years as the season shifts. 

Lately, I've noticed Jude particularly "pulling away" from the momma-bond in what seems, at least according to Dobson, to be a healthy way.  This weekend, the "men" were staying at my Dad's farmhouse while Asher and I were spending the night with my grandmother to give her a little company. I tagged along on their fishing trip that afternoon so I could enjoy the open beauty of the farm.  But when we loaded up the cars, Jude made sure I wasn't joining in on the man's adventure that evening.  I'm so grateful to have a little insight in this season…or my feelings might be hurt.  I mean, I can rough it at the farmhouse with the rest of them, right? I had to remind myself that it's not personal.  Jude loves some mom-time.  He is totally a sweetheart to me.  But he craves time with his Dad.  I want to embrace and encourage that. 

Previously, when I thought of moving toward manhood, I thought more about a 13 year old.  But research suggests that the foundation is being laid right now-  at 3-5 years.  This pulling away now is essential to healthy development later. Whew.  These little years of fishing trips are shaping long years of manhood.  

Watching these boys with David makes my heart feel so full.  This man that is so loving, servant-hearted, strong and hard working…he is the one from whom they are learning manhood.  These granddads and uncles are becoming the noble heroes of my little boys.  Now is the time for me to encourage that.  So fish on, little men. Fish on. 

What a privilege to be bringing up boys

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